Alexis Strikes Again

I've been blessed with the opportunity to show hospitality to many people during our time here in Langley.  Whether it is for dinner, for an overnight visit, for game night, for a playdate, or whatever, we have enjoyed using this beautiful home God has given us as a place to welcome guests! 

This past weekend we had guests, and guess who showed up the week before?  Alexis.  I didn't ask her to come, but as soon as she heard that we were having friends come for the weekend, she was on my doorstep with a to-do list for my preparations.  A few of the things on her list were that I needed to wash the windows, dust, sweep the floors (including the baseboards, which hardly ever get included!), mop, clean the light fixtures, vacuum the stairs, clean the blinds, and so on.  I should have known she'd show up.  She has impeccable timing for things like that.  I did take some of her suggestions, but thanks to these other two posts (here and here) about hospitality, I was also able to say no to many of her "shoulds."  Alexis' house is well-organized and spotless-- I don't know how she does it with a child in the house and all of her other activities! 

But then again, my guests didn't come to hang out with Alexis, they came to see me.  Jeana.  Not Alexis.  And I (Jeana, not Alexis) have less energy than I would like, so if I waste it all on cleaning the baseboards and light fixtures, I will have that much less energy for our time together.  Is there anyone out there who would turn their nose up at me if my baseboards were not clean?  Would you insist on staying somewhere else or eating somewhere else if there was a bit of dust on my chandeliers?  I have not yet come across someone who would admit to those things, but maybe they're just being kind. 

What do you think?  What are the things you don't get to before guests arrive?

-JLR

Meet Alexis

This morning, Alexis got out of bed promptly at 7am.  She went out for a morning walk, came back, showered, did her morning devotions, and made a nice breakfast for her family.  She looked radiant and yet understated in her freshly laundered, trendy clothes.  Her makeup brought out her natural beauty without looking gaudy or overdone.  The truth is, Alexis could go without makeup and be just fine. 

By 9am, Alexis had finished her morning chores (kitchen clean, beds made, etc.) as well as her "chore of the day"... today it was sweeping and scrubbing the floors.  She was ready to start homeschooling her daughter and had already prepared an extra craft and science activity that they would start on their morning break.  School began promptly at 9 with a cheerful attitude and big smile.  What exciting things would they learn today!?

Alexis is not quite real, if you hadn't guessed.  She's my alter-ego and the personification of my mental "shoulds" list.  She's all the things I want for myself but don't have the time or energy to actually have.  She is who I picture as the perfect wife and mom.  She bears an unreasonable load of responsibilities-- at home, at school, in the ministry, in her friendships, in her marriage, as a parent... I think you get the picture.  She never seems overly stressed, either.  She takes it all in stride and holds up well.  Others think she's amazing.  And she is.  She's a dream and yet I despise her.  She's TOO perfect.  So perfect that I could never be like that in a million years.  I've tried, but it's not possible.  I don't have enough time or energy to be like Alexis.  So I've decided that she must live here on my blog from now on. 

The real Jeana got out of bed at 8:30 this morning, stumbled into the shower, made breakfast and finally told M to turn the am cartoons off at 9:30.  No makeup.  No hairstyle.  It's Wednesday, after all, and I have no one to impress.  It's 10:15 and we have yet to start homeschool for the day, but will hopefully get to it soon.  My kitchen is a wreck and my floors are definitely not scrubbed!  But that's ok.  I'm more real this way.  And I will get to those things in time.  Right now there are more important things to do... things like drinking a cuppa tea and rejecting all those "shoulds" that I feel piled on my shoulders.  Because today is a new day and my name is Jeana, not Alexis.

-JLR
ps... Alexis is not named after anyone I know nor is she based on anyone I know... unless of course you count the perfect, idealized expectations I have for myself.